The Cooler

William H. Macy has sad sack down. The dude knows how to look pitiful, weak, lame, but still likeable. Sitting here I can’t even think of a movie where he isn’t pitiful. Mystery Men maybe, but even as the leader of the team he’s still pretty morose and neurotic.. nope can’t think of a movie where he is totally not begging the audience for pity. Well The Cooler is about Macy being pitiful, not quite as pitiful as he was in Magnolia with the braces and the infatuation with a bartender and that dude who was the bad guy in Bio-Dome, and not nearly as pitiful as Macy’s character in Boogie Nights, wow Paul Thomas Anderson hates William H. Macy.

"I hate you William H. Macy, I fucking hate you"

So Macy’s character is Bernie and he is a cooler, a dude in a casino that makes people lose, I imagine if coolers are a real thing the real ones would use tricks and shit, but Bernie is so unlucky he emanates an aura of shit luck so he just walks by people playing craps, slots, black jack, war, whatever and they start losing, therefore the casino loses less money. The casino in question is owned or operated whatever, the dude in control of the Shangrila is Alec Baldwin, well it’s not actually Alec Baldwin it’s his character Shelly.

This is not a documentary, Baldwin does not work in a casino

I guess the main story is supposed to be Bernie falling in love with Natalie (Maria Bello), which is a pretty good story, but it seemed to get equal screen time and importance as Alec Baldwin fighting with Ron Livingston about Old Vegas vs. New Vegas. I found this part way more interesting and was kind of confused about 2 things: Why did Alec Baldwin get nominated for best supporting actor when he’s on-screen as often as Macy? and why didn’t Wayne Kramer just make a movie about Shelly and his old school Vegas vs. Ron Livingston and his “Epcot center” Vegas? I haven’t the faintest idea about the first one and it’s probably a really stupid answer so don’t tell me, but the second question may have something to do with Shelly being a horrible dude and Kramer didn’t want to make us side with such a terrible dude. Or maybe every one working in the film industry hates William H. Macy and Kramer just wanted to do a movie where he could treat him like shit for an hour and twenty minutes.

"God knows that's the only reason I make movies"

Macy is good but he’s pretty much always good.

not always but pretty much

Maria Bello is quite good and does well with what she is given. Paul Sorvino has a small part as an old school rat pack style crooner and he is great. Alec Baldwin is incredible, his character is a great bad guy like Don Logan in Sexy Beast, or The Sheriff of Nottingham in Robin Hood Prince of Theives, or The Joker in The Joker Movie featuring Batman. Ron Livingston is really great as like the new Baldwin who comes in to try to update the Shangrila casino to get more people in and therefore get more money. Ron Livingston is one of those guys that should be in more movies because he’s really good. The dude should totally have the same career Baldwin had when he was his age, Livingston has the talent, maybe he’s an alpaca farmer on the side and that’s his true love while acting is just a hobby, like quilting, or paintball.

Oh here’s a problem a have. Let’s first ask the questiong one should always ask of a film: Is the RZA in it?



this guy is.

He’s not in it a lot but Joey Fatone from N*Sync is totally in this flick.

Do I recommend The Cooler? Hell yes, especially if you like Hard Eight, it’s similar in scale and tone to The Cooler, or if you like Alec Baldwin, William “Sad Sack” H. Macy, or are really into looking at poker chips getting moved around cause that happens a lot.


3 Responses to “The Cooler”

  1. So… from what I can tell, so far the only movie that you’ve reviewed with the RZA in it was Repomen. Dude obviously needs to do more movies.

  2. Well, according to IMDB he’s going to be in 5 more movies that are coming out in 2010, so things are looking up…

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